And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
