Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
Dude they even gave me free lube for being tested! Best. Hiv test. EVER.
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize
