The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Randomize
