Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
Randomize
