Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
Funny, my mom didn't get it when I said 'that's what she said' after she said 'it's so thick, it's impossible' in reference to my milkshake
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
Found half of a five day old piece of pizza behind my dresser. Apparently it was drunkenly set there and got knocked down. It was such a happy reminder of last weekend.
I found a cheeseburger next to my tub once. It's there to shame you, but it always just makes me feel more awesome.
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
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