she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
Randomize
