Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize
