i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize