He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
Randomize
