I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
