whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
Randomize
