best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize
