Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize