how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
Randomize
