he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
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