we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Randomize
