made out with the bouncer to distract him from how illegitimate my fake id is.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
I love you. Go after that dick
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
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