M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
Randomize
