Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
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