I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
You were so drunk that you didn't even notice when I switched out your shot of jäger for a shot of maple syrup...before or after you drank it.
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
Randomize
