fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
If you don't answer the phone then I will be forced to leave you a wonderful voicemail of me throwing up
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
Randomize
