After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
He was too drunk, and my mother and I ended up babysitting him. He told her I have amazing mouth skills, and that I love the "chorizo" he feeds me. All she said was "And on the list of 30 things you never want to hear about your daughter..." while gripping the steering wheel.Please just fucking kill me now.
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Randomize