the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize