She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
