Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
Randomize