sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize
