I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
When did angry sex become our thing?
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
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