Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
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