Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
This is a mass text: my birthday is tomorrow, and I want a full day of birthday sex. Send me your availabities. Time slots begin at noon
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Randomize
