dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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