About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
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