love makes seman taste better
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize
