yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
last night I used snow as a chaser
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
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