at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
i permit you to call me
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
Thanks for being the best husband and reassuring my fuck buddy that you're comfortable with my adultery. You da real MVP.
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
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