Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
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