It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
Is it because I queefed?
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
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