I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
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