Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
Also epiphany: I gotta quit fucking with dudes that have never seen Harry Potter. They all turn out to be shitheads who probably eat honeydew.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
