I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
last night I used snow as a chaser
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
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