Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
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