hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
Public service announcement: if you would like to continue receiving blow jobs, a 25% increase in fuck-giving will be expected immediately, and you're expected to give an actual flying fuck at least once a week. Brought to you by the ad council.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
Randomize
