I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
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