How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
My 12 y/o god son's bandmate just asked me to their school dance. Still he's a better catch than the last one...
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
Randomize
