So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
Stop bringing these fucking whores home with you. If I have to fight over the remote with a bleach blonde idiot wanting to watch the hills reruns one more time I'm pissing in your shampoo.
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
