The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Randomize
