In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Randomize
