She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
Just in case the world ends tomorrow, I have an emergency contact group of booty calls I can send a quick "let's fuck" to before I die.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Randomize
