i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
She asked how many sexual partners I'd had and I was like "Honestly I don't even know". And then she said "well last time you said 8." And my inner monologue busted out laughing and I was like "Oh I'd say like 11 or 12.....plus 20."
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
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