Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
Remember the guy with the pretty voice that gave us crabs?
Randomize
