So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
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