Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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