like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
people are starting to question the shark bite story
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
Randomize
